Prepare the handover

Start the settling-in period at the nursery or with the childminder two weeks before your first day, with short visits that get longer. Write the baby's rhythm down: last feed, usual nap, what soothes. The handover feature in this app produces exactly that page in one tap.

Keeping breastfeeding going

Many countries guarantee paid breastfeeding breaks and a place to express at work, in line with the ILO Maternity Protection Convention. Expressed milk keeps four days in the fridge and six months in a freezer. Breastfeeding mornings, evenings and nights keeps supply up even when the day feeds are bottles.

About the guilt

Feeling torn is close to universal and says nothing about your parenting. Research on early childcare finds that what matters for the child is the quality of care and a warm relationship at home, not the number of hours apart. Keep one ritual that is only yours: the evening bath, the first feed of the morning.

Your rights: what to check before going back

The ILO Maternity Protection Convention sets out principles that many countries have written into law: protection of employment during and after leave, return to the same or an equivalent post, breastfeeding breaks, and protection of the mother's health at work. But the length of leave, how it is paid, the breaks and how they work all vary from one country to another, and sometimes by collective agreement or company size.

Before you return, ask your employer, human resources or the relevant national authority what applies to your situation: adjusted hours, part-time work, working from home, additional parental leave, a return-to-work health check. Put your requests in writing; an email is often enough.

If you feel your return is unwelcome, or your role has changed without discussion, you can seek advice from staff representatives, the labour inspectorate or a specialist organisation before you respond.

Expressing at work: the practical set-up

Once the place and the breaks are agreed with your employer, it comes down to equipment and routine. Plan for a pump suited to frequent sessions, clean bottles or storage bags, and a cool bag with ice packs for the journey home. Expressed milk can be kept at room temperature for a few hours, in the fridge or in the freezer within the recommended times, and thawed milk should not be refrozen.

In the first days the amount you express is often disappointing: a pump does not stimulate the way a baby does, and stress slows let-down. Looking at a photo or video of your child, dropping your shoulders and gently massaging the breast before you start genuinely help.

If you notice a red, hot, painful area on the breast, or you have a fever or chills, do not delay seeing a doctor or midwife: mastitis is far easier to treat when caught early.

The first weeks apart, from the baby's side

Many babies sleep less well, feed differently or want more holding in the weeks after starting nursery or a childminder. This is adjustment, not regression, and it usually settles as the new routine becomes familiar. Some babies refuse a bottle from an unfamiliar person at first and then catch up by feeding a lot in the evening and at night: keep those feeds, they reassure as much as they nourish.

The WHO nurturing care framework reminds us that young children need, wherever they are, sensitive responses to their signals, safety and security, and chances to play and learn. A good childcare setting describes the day to you, respects your breastfeeding pattern and takes your questions without judging them.

If your baby stops feeding for a sustained period, loses weight, seems listless or has a fever, see a doctor promptly; if breathing becomes difficult, call emergency services.

Finding your own balance

Going back to work adds a whole working day to a life that is already full. In the first weeks aim for the essentials rather than perfection: simple meals, an imperfect house, the nursery bag packed the night before. Share the new tasks explicitly with your partner or people around you: who drops off, who collects, who stays home when the baby is ill, who books the paediatrician.

Keep an eye on how you are. Tiredness that never lifts, unusual irritability, frequent tears or losing pleasure in things that used to help are not simply normal because you are working: speak to your doctor, midwife or a mental health professional. If thoughts of harming yourself appear, contact emergency services immediately.

Finally, allow yourself to enjoy your work. Colleagues, a skill, an identity beyond being a parent are among the things that protect your mood.

Frequently asked questions

When should I tell my employer my return date?

Notice periods depend on your country, your contract and sometimes a collective agreement. Check with human resources or the relevant national authority, and confirm your date in writing. If you want adjusted hours or another arrangement, ask as early as possible so there is time to organise it.

How can I express at work if there is no dedicated room?

Discuss it with your employer before you return: a booked meeting room, a lockable office or a first-aid room can work, as long as there is a socket and a chair. Toilets are not a suitable place. Many countries regulate this obligation; the relevant national authority can tell you what applies.

My baby refuses the bottle at nursery, what can I do?

This is common at first. Let the carer try while you are out of sight, with expressed milk and calm, unhurried offers. Many babies make up for it by feeding more in the evening and at night. If the refusal persists and weight gain worries you, see the paediatrician or midwife.

Will going back to work reduce my milk supply?

Not necessarily. Supply follows demand: expressing regularly during the day, roughly at the times of the usual feeds, and keeping morning, evening and night feeds maintains it. If you notice a marked drop, a lactation consultant or midwife can help you adjust.

Is it bad for my baby to be in childcare all day?

Research on early development points to the quality of care received and the warmth of the relationship at home, not the length of time apart. Responsive care with stable, attentive adults meets a child's needs. What counts is the quality of your time together when you are reunited.

How do I handle the guilt at drop-off?

Create a short goodbye ritual that is the same every day, and leave without sneaking away: babies are reassured by predictability. Remember that the vast majority of parents share this feeling. If it becomes overwhelming or comes with persistent sadness, talk to your doctor or midwife.

This article gives general information. It does not replace advice from a healthcare professional.

Sources

Sources checked on 2026-09-06.